French You Can Flex With. Finally.
You already know ‘bonjour’ and ‘banane.’ Cute. Now it’s time to sound actually French – with 150+ juicy lessons (and the occasional cheeky Mini Bite) landing in your inbox. 💌
Bite-sized, memorable lessons by email. (Pssst…Check your spam 👀)
WHAT WE DO
We teach you French like your boldest Parisian friend would.
Juicy, bite-sized lessons designed to make you sound less like a robot and more like someone who actually gets it. It’s not just teaching – it’s teasing (lovingly), calling out awkward mistakes, dropping real cultural gems, and serving extra sass.
Not to make you perfect – just perfectly French 🇫🇷.
😳 Mistakes that make you say "Oh No"
Learn the most common (and most awkward) mistakes French learners make, and why they matter.
Example: Saying “je suis chaude”? You just said you’re horny. Try “j’ai chaud” instead.
💅 Tips to actually sound French (not like a robot)
French is more than grammar rules – it’s how you say things. Learn tips that make you sound like someone who lives there.
Example: Instead of “oui,” say “ouais.” Instead of perfection, go for vibe.
🇫🇷 Cultural clues that make French... Make sense
French isn’t just a language – it’s a whole vibe. We’ll give you the cultural clues behind what people say, think, and mean.
Example: Why do French people say “bof” when they just… don’t care?
And... French Mini Bites
Little gems you didn’t know you were missing. Slang, cheeky one-liners, and French quirks that make you smirk – your Thursday 10 AM treat.
Example: Five different ways the French say “cheers.” 🥂
See the full journey
Swipe to see the 3 pages, and 150 lessons
If you want to speak the language of La Baguette…
SNEAK PEEK
Need An Example? Et Voilà
Curious what you’ll actually get? Here’s a peek. Each email is short, fun, and gets straight to the point — so you learn something real and remember it.
From: The Oh No Club
To: Your Inbox
😳 Feeling excited? Careful what you say in French…
👋 Salut toi!
Ready for another dose of French chaos? Today, we’re tackling one of the most awkward little traps that makes French people giggle… or blush. 😅
Your lesson of the day
❌ Oh No! Don’t say:
Je suis excité(e) to mean “I’m excited.”
✅ Say instead:
J’ai hâte (Literally: I have haste / I can’t wait)
🔉 Sound French:
[zhay aht] → Like “jay aht,” but say it like you’re bubbling with anticipation and already five steps ahead in your mind.
😏 The (Sassy) Explanation:
You want to say “I’m excited for the weekend,” right?
Say “je suis excité(e),” and suddenly you’re not just excited – you’re turned on.
Big difference. Huge misunderstanding. 😳
To keep it cute and non-horny, say:
“J’ai hâte du week-end !” = I can’t wait for the weekend!
Trust us – your dignity (and your coworkers) will thank you.
Bisous bisous 💋
⚡️ Quick Examples:
-
“J’ai hâte de te voir !” → I can’t wait to see you!
-
“Tu viens ce soir ? J’ai trop hâte !” → You coming tonight? I’m so pumped!
- “Je suis très excité(e) de te rencontrer…” → I’m really turned on to meet you… 😳
Confusing Camembert and Brie?
Mon dieu! You need us.
PRICING
Our pricing is simple – just like your future French.
Start with a 7-day free trial – no card, no strings attached.
If you’re loving it, unlock the full package of 150 lessons to keep your journey going (and sound irresistibly French).
1. Start with your free trial
✅ Sign up -> Completely FREE.
✅ 7 lessons, one per day
✅ Weekly French Mini Bites
If you love it, and want more… 👇
2. Unlock Full Access
🥐 9.90€ one-time payment
✅ 150+ lessons
✅ Complete journey to sound actually French
You’ll get the chance to unlock it after Lesson 7, via a dedicated link – only if you’re feeling the spark.
Start for Free
No card. No pressure. Just better French.
Delightful lessons by email. (Pssst…Check you spam 👀)
TESTIMONIALS
From Our (Cam)Members
The sass made it stick. I still laugh every time I say “j’ai chaud” now.
Just a different way to learn French! I learned many things no one ever taught me before.
Those emails feel like a funny French friend is teaching me what not to say. I actually look forward to them. No guilt, no pressure – just real learning.
I literally laught (even a little bit) at every lesson. 18 in, and still going with enthusiasm!
I’ve been learning French on and off for years, and this is the first time I actually remembered things without forcing myself. Plus, I now understand why “merci beaucoup” is dangerous to mispronounce 😳
The “R” in “Croissant” will be hard, but hey, you can fix the other stuff
ABOUT US
The Project & The Team
At the Oh No Club, we believe people learn best through emotion – by messing up, laughing about it, and saying, “Oh no… never again.” This started as a fun side project by me 🙋♂️ – a product manager who loves French, Duolingo, and building delightful things.
The twist? My team isn’t entirely human. I built The Oh No Club with an AI-powered crew that helps brainstorm, test, design, and sass — one juicy email at a time.
Mistake by mistake, we’re making French more fun, more human, and way more memorable. 💌
Tolgay
Real Founder / Product
Clara
AI-CMO
Julien
AI-CFO
Sophie
AI-COO
Marc
AI-CTO
Nico
AI-UX
Zoé
AI-RESEARCH
Élodie
AI-French Culture Expert
FAQ
What People Ask
Is this for beginners or advanced learners?
If you’ve ever said “je suis chaud” by accident – welcome. This is for learners who know a little French, but want to sound a lot better.
Why email? Isn’t there an app for that?
There are many other apps out there to learn French. But your inbox? That’s where we live now. Easy, human, and mistake by mistake, you’ll learn something real.
Will this make me fluent in French?
It’ll make you fluent in the fun parts — sounding natural, avoiding awkward moments, and understanding cultural clues. That’s pretty fluent if you ask us.